ASH
Charlotte, NC
*These questions were answered via email.
Do you think anything about the way you were raised or where you grew up affected how you drew conclusions about your identity?
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I think growing up in a Baptist household made me think that gender diversity was problematic.
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Can you give any examples of misconceptions people have about those who identify outside the binary?
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People think that all of us are binary trans people. People have a hard time understanding non-binary and gender non-conforming identities.
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Have you personally dealt with them?
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Yes.
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In your own words, how would you explain that gender identity is different from sexual orientation?
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I would say sex is assigned and chosen gender is expression of true self, to keep it simple.
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How do you feel represented in media and society at large?
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I don’t feel represented in the media as a GNC [gender non-conforming] person. I see a lot of white people being legible as GNC.
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What improvements would you like to see happen inside your communities, and in society at large?
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I would like to see self-determination for trans people of color.
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Who in your life do you feel you can trust or depend on?
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My chosen family — 4 trans women and 1 trans man.
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How has your identity played a role in your relationships, romantic or otherwise?
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My identity makes my relationships difficult. My partners who don’t already consider themselves queer have a hard time understanding that by being in a relationship with me, our relationship is inherently queer.
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Are you able to find adequate medical care?
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No.
What are your pronouns?
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They/them.
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Where do you work?
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Sistersong Women of Color Reproductive Justice Collective.
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Do you have any hobbies or special interests?
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Dance, organizing, building things.
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What do you do for fun?
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Dance, read.
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How do you handle the issue of pronouns and being gendered when interacting with strangers / mixed company / etc?
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If I feel safe enough, I correct people when they get my pronouns wrong. If I don’t feel safe, I don’t say anything.
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Have you had difficulties with changing your name and the way it affects you moving through the world, being recognized how you want, or being mis-gendered?
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I haven’t changed my name legally. I shortened my name recently from Ashley to Ash.
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What word(s) would you use to describe your identity?
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Femme. Trans. Gender non-conforming. Dancer. Philosopher. Organizer.
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Are there ways that you dress / act / speak / etc. to specifically make a statement to others about your identity? Why?
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I wear whatever I want. I don’t wear bras as a political choice.
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How early on did you know or suspect that you did not identify within the binary?
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I knew early on, but I didn’t have language and shared understanding until about 4 years ago.
What are your concerns for the future?
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I’m concerned that trans folks won’t be able to live self-determined lives.
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What do you look forward to in the future?
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Black joy and having fun with chosen family.
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What have been the important frustrations in your life, and the most important successes?
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Deciding to go back to school.
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Do you have a philosophy of life? What’s your best piece of advice?
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Fuck the police!
